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The Realistic Timeline of Life Milestones in America

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Milestones are often seen as defining moments in a person’s life, whether it’s graduating from college, buying a first home, getting married, or retiring. Yet, the ongoing cost-of-living crisis has placed significant pressure on household finances across the U.S.

In fact, research from the Pew Research Center in 2025 shows that almost three in ten adults (28%) predict their financial situation will worsen in the next year. [1] Pew Research Center, 'Growing share of U.S. adults say their personal finances will be worse a year from now', 2025 https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2025/05/07/growing-share-of-us-adults-say-their-personal-finances-will-be-worse-a-year-from-now Consequently, many Americans may be rethinking how, when and if they celebrate major life events, with expensive milestones being delayed, scaled down, or replaced by more achievable goals that better reflect today’s financial realities.

A new survey on behalf of Self Financial surveyed 2,023 U.S. adults to explore how the rising cost of living and external factors have affected their ability to achieve key life milestones. The research explores how today’s financial reality is changing the way people plan their lives, with some putting big dreams on hold, and others defining what success looks like, and many wondering if important milestones are still possible.

Key findings:

America’s most important milestones

To understand what people value most in life, participants were asked to share which traditional milestones they see as the most important. These milestones offer insight into personal priorities, aspirations, and the ways in which individuals measure success and fulfillment.

Owning a home is seen as the most important life milestone

When asked which milestones matter most, owning a home was the top priority, cited by 22% of respondents. Getting married followed at 19.6%, while having a child or children was considered important by 14.6%. Graduating from high school (9%) and college (7.5%) ranked lower, and completing a master’s, PhD, or other advanced qualification was cited by just 2.2% of adults.

Career success, such as earning a substantial income, owning a business, or receiving a promotion, was important to 4.7%. Other milestones were cited by smaller minorities such as financial and life independence (paying off debt, 3.5%, moving out of shared or parental housing, 2.3%), experiences and leisure (travelling, 3.4%, buying a first car, 2.3%, owning a pet, 1.4%), relationships (strong friendships, 2.9%, falling in love, 1.6%), and retirement (2.3%).

America’s most important milestones
Milestone Percentage of respondents
Owning your own home 22.0%
Getting married 19.6%
Having a child/children 14.6%
Graduating from high school 9.0%
Graduating from college 7.5%
Career success (for example earning a substantial income, owning a business or getting a promotion) 4.7%
Paying off debt (for example, student loans) 3.5%
Travelling 3.4%
Having strong friendships 2.9%
Moving out of shared or parental housing 2.3%
Buying your first car 2.3%
Retiring from work 2.3%
Completing a master’s, PhD, or other advanced qualification 2.2%
Falling in love 1.6%
Owning a pet 1.4%

Homeownership tops the list of most important milestones (22%) but falling in love barely registers at 1.6%.

Women were slightly more likely than men to prioritize family-related milestones. For instance, 20.6% of women named getting married as important compared to 17.2% of men, and 15.2% of women cited having children was a top achievement versus 13.1% of men.

On the other hand, men placed slightly more emphasis on career and lifestyle milestones, as 5.6% of men highlighted career success as an important milestone compared to 4.4% of women. Likewise 4.4% of men valued travelling versus 3% of women. Other differences were also relatively minor, with both genders placing low importance on advanced qualifications, pets, buying a first car, and falling in love.

Most important milestones (men versus women)
Milestone Men Women
Owning your own home 21.9% 22.1%
Getting married 17.2% 20.6%
Having a child/children 13.1% 15.2%
Graduating from high school 9.1% 9.0%
Graduating from college 7.3% 7.6%
Career success (for example earning a substantial income, owning a business or getting a promotion) 5.6% 4.4%
Travelling 4.4% 3.0%
Paying off debt (for example, student loans) 3.7% 3.5%
Having strong friendships 3.1% 2.9%
Completing a master’s, PhD, or other advanced qualification 2.8% 2.0%
Moving out of shared or parental housing 2.5% 2.3%
Retiring from work 2.6% 2.1%
Buying your first car 2.2% 2.3%
Falling in love 1.5% 1.6%
Owning a pet 1.6% 1.3%
None of the above 1.3% 0.1%

*Respondents could select more than one option.

When do Americans believe they’ll reach traditional milestones?

The survey asked participants when they expected to hit traditional life milestones, and for those who had already done so, what age they had originally imagined they would reach them.

Graduating from high school and college

Graduating from high school
Age Percentage of participants
Under 18 38.2%
18-24 57.0%
25-30 1.6%
31-35 0.8%
36-40 0.5%
41-45 0.3%
61-64 0.3%
Don't plan to graduate from high school 1.3%

For the majority of participants (57%), high school graduation was expected between the ages of 18 and 24, while 38.2% anticipated finishing slightly earlier, before turning 18. Most students typically graduate around 17 or 18, though some can finish as early as 16 through accelerated programs. In contrast, a smaller group may graduate later, between 19 and 22, due to various circumstances. [2] Coursmos, 'What Age Do You Graduate High School? (2025 Stats)', 2025 https://www.coursmos.com/what-age-do-you-graduate-high-school/

Graduating from college
Age Percentage of participants
Under 18 0.3%
18-24 61.0%
25-30 18.5%
31-35 5.4%
36-40 2.4%
41-45 1.1%
46-50 0.3%
51-55 0.5%
Don't plan to graduate from college 10.5%

When asked about college graduation, 61% of participants expected to finish between the ages of 18 and 24, while 18.5% anticipated graduating slightly later, between 25 and 30. Full-time students typically complete a bachelor’s degree within four to five years of starting college, [3] Coursera, 'How Long Does It Take to Get a Bachelor’s Degree?', 2024 https://www.coursera.org/articles/how-long-does-it-take-to-get-a-bachelors-degree and most must have finished high school and be at least 17 years old. [4] Education USA, 'Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)' https://educationusa.state.gov/experience-studying-usa/us-educational-system/frequently-asked-questions-faqs This means that, for many, graduation is likely to occur between the ages of 21 and 23.

Around one in ten (10.5%) reported that they do not plan to graduate from college, either by not attending or not completing their program. Separately, national enrollment data show that total U.S. college enrollment declined from approximately 18.1 million students in 2010 to about 15.4 million in 2022. [5] Best Colleges, 'U.S. College Enrollment Decline Statistics', 2025 https://www.bestcolleges.com/research/college-enrollment-decline/

A previous study conducted on behalf of Self Financial in 2023 found that the average spend on academic supplies and books over a four-year degree is $4,759. Without considering other costs of being a student, such as room, board and tuition, the cost may play a role in the decline of post secondary education.

Buying a first car

Buying a first car
Age Percentage of participants
Under 18 14.5%
18-24 53%
25-30 16.4%
31-35 5.1%
36-40 3.2%
41-45 2.4%
46-50 0.8%
56-60 0.3%
61-64 0.3%
Don't plan to buy a car 4%

A traditional life milestone that many young people look forward to is the freedom that comes with buying their first car. The age at which you can get a driver’s licence varies by state, with some states allowing learner’s permits from as young as 14, while a full unrestricted licence is typically allowed from 17-18. [6] Parents, 'Driving Age by State', 2025 https://www.parents.com/driving-age-by-state-8607683

For the survey respondents, most (53%) believed they would be in a position to buy their first car between the ages of 18-24. Honda Civics have been named one of the most popular car models for Gen Z, [7] Insurify, 'The Most Popular Cars by Generation, From Zoomers to Boomers (2024)', 2024 https://insurify.com/car-insurance/insights/most-popular-cars-by-generation/ and depending on vehicle details, the average used Honda Civic sells for around $17k (between January and February 2026). [8] CarGurus, 'Used Honda Civic pricing trends' https://www.cargurus.com/research/price-trends/Honda-Civic-d586

Moving out of shared or parental housing

Moving out of shared or parental housing
Age Percentage of participants
Under 18 7.3%
18-24 54.8%
25-30 19.1%
31-35 6.5%
36-40 4.8%
41-45 0.5%
46-50 1.6%
51-55 0.3%
Don't plan to move out of shared or parental housing 5.1%

Over half of respondents (54.8%) believed they would be financially ready to move out of parental or shared housing between the ages of 18 and 24. In reality, most people typically leave home between 24 and 27, suggesting that survey participants may be slightly optimistic about when they will be able to settle into their own place. [9] iMoving, 'What is the Average Age to Move Out of Parents House?', 2025 https://www.imoving.com/blog/before-your-move/average-age-to-move-out-of-parents-house/

Just over one in ten respondents (11.3%) expected they wouldn’t be able to move out until between the ages of 31 and 40. Separately, U.S. Census data indicate that the share of adults reaching multiple traditional milestones by ages 25 to 34 has declined over time: in 1975, 45% of individuals in this age group were living independently, employed, married, and had children, compared with 21% in 2024. [10] United States Census Bureau, 'Most Young Adults Had Not Reached Key Milestones of Adulthood in 2024', 2025 https://www.census.gov/library/stories/2025/08/milestones-to-adulthood.html

Go travelling

Go travelling
Age Percentage of participants
Under 18 6.5%
18-24 27.4%
25-30 19.4%
31-35 11.6%
36-40 9.1%
41-45 6.5%
46-50 2.4%
51-55 3.0%
56-60 4.6%
61-64 1.1%
65+ 0.3%
Don't plan to go travelling 8.3%

When it comes to travelling, over a quarter of respondents (27.4%) expected to hit this milestone between the ages of 18 and 24, while nearly one in five (19.4%) planned to do so between 25 and 30. By contrast, 17.7% anticipated seeing the world much later, between the ages of 41 and 65+.

Buying a home

Buying a home
Age Percentage of participants
18-24 6.7%
25-30 24.2%
31-35 23.7%
36-40 16.9%
41-45 11.3%
46-50 5.1%
51-55 3.5%
56-60 1.9%
65+ 0.3%
Don't plan to buying a home 6.5%

Owning a home topped the list of life milestones, cited by 22% of respondents, highlighting its continued importance as a symbol of independence and success. For most (24.2%), they expected to buy their first home between the ages of 25 and 30, reflecting this aspiration. Yet the reality is often different as between July 2024 and June 2025, the typical median age of a first-time homebuyer in the U.S. was 40. [11] National Associate of Realtors, 'Highlights From the Profile of Home Buyers and Sellers' https://www.nar.realtor/research-and-statistics/research-reports/highlights-from-the-profile-of-home-buyers-and-sellers

Another 23.7% expected to buy a home slightly later, between 31 and 35, suggesting that while the dream of homeownership remains strong, expectations could be gradually adjusting to today’s economic realities.

A previous study conducted on behalf of Self Financial in 2023 considered the real cost of owning a home to be $623,290 for the average occupancy period of one home (13.2 years) when considering costs such as as mortgage repayments and down payments, but it also factors in insurance, closing fees, moving costs, ongoing maintenance, renovations, and utilities, including WiFi. Although mortgage rates are expected to dip in 2026, persistently high borrowing costs are still expected to continue making it difficult for homebuyers. [12] Realtor.com, 'Realtor.com 2025 Housing Forecast', 2024 https://www.realtor.com/research/2025-national-housing-forecast/

Getting married

Getting married
Age Percentage of participants
18-24 19.9%
25-30 37.6%
31-35 15.3%
36-40 8.1%
41-45 4.3%
46-50 1.3%
51-55 0.5%
56-60 0.5%
Don’t plan to get married 12.4%

Finding the right partner and getting married was another top milestone for respondents. Almost two in five (37.6%) expected this to happen between the ages of 25 and 30. For context, U.S. Census data show that in 2024 the median age at first marriage was 30.2 years for men and 28.6 years for women, compared with 29.2 for men and 27.1 for women in 2015. [13] United States Census Bureau, 'Historical Marital Status Tables', 2024 https://www.census.gov/data/tables/time-series/demo/families/marital.html

Just under one in five respondents (19.9%) planned to tie the knot earlier, between the ages of 18 and 24. Additionally, one in eight respondents (12.4%) said they had no intention of settling down or marrying.

Interestingly, a previous study conducted on behalf of Self Financial in 2025 found that 32.8% of respondents said that financial benefits such as marriage tax benefits are a positive financial impact of being in a relationship.

Despite being a top milestone to achieve, 12.4% say they don’t ever plan on getting married.

Having a first and second child

Having a first child
Age Percentage of participants
Under 18 1.9%
18-24 22.8%
25-30 33.1%
31-35 15.3%
36-40 5.6%
41-45 1.6%
46-50 0.3%
65+ 0.3%
Don't plan to have a child 19.1%

For a third of respondents (33.1%), having their first child was expected to happen between the ages of 25 and 30, followed by 22.8% who anticipated becoming parents earlier, between 18 and 24. Another 15.3% expected this milestone to come later, between 31 and 35, while 5.6% said they wouldn’t have children until ages 36 to 40.

Separately, almost one in five respondents (19.1%) said they never planned to have children. For context, Pew Research Center data shows that the share of U.S. adults under 50 who are childfree and unlikely to ever have children has risen from 37% in 2018 to 47% in 2023. [14] Pew Research Center, 'What do Americans think about fewer people choosing to have children?', 2024 https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2024/08/02/what-do-americans-think-about-fewer-people-choosing-to-have-children/

Have a second child
Age Percentage of participants
Under 18 0.3%
18-24 6.5%
25-30 27.4%
31-35 23.7%
36-40 8.1%
41-45 4.0%
46-50 0.8%
Don't plan to have a second child 29.3%

When it comes to having a second child, 27.4% of respondents expected this to happen between the ages of 25 and 30, while 23.7% envisioned starting later, between 31 and 35. By comparison, 15.3% had originally expected to have their first child at this same age range.

Also of note, 29.3% said they don’t plan to ever have a second child. Historical data does show that in 1960, the average family had 2.33 children under the age of 18, while in 2023, this number decreased to 1.94. [15] Statista, 'Average number of own children under 18 in families with children in the United States from 1960 to 2023', 2024 https://www.statista.com/statistics/718084/average-number-of-own-children-per-family/

Retire

Retire from work
Age Percentage of participants
18-24 0.5%
25-30 0.3%
31-35 2.2%
36-40 2.2%
41-45 3.5%
46-50 5.4%
51-55 7.3%
56-60 19.4%
61-64 17.2%
65+ 34.4%
Don't plan to retire from work 7.8%

Retirement is a commonly cited milestone. Over a third of respondents (34.4%) expected to retire after the age of 65. For context, national data show that in 2024 the average retirement age was 64.6 years for men and 62.6 years for women. [16] Center for Retirement Research, 'Will the Average Retirement Age Keep Rising?', 2025 https://crr.bc.edu/will-the-average-retirement-age-keep-rising/

On the other hand, 7.8% said they don’t plan to retire at all. Another 7.8% hoped to retire much earlier, between the ages of 31 and 45.

Paying off debts

Paying off debts
Age Percentage of participants
Under 18 0.8%
18-24 4.0%
25-30 9.9%
31-35 16.9%
36-40 15.9%
41-45 11.3%
46-50 9.1%
51-55 7.8%
56-60 3.8%
61-64 2.2%
65+ 4.6%
Don't plan to pay off my debt 13.7%

Debt is accumulated in a number of ways over a lifetime. From student loans to credit card debt and mortgages, the amount will vary person to person and throughout each stage of life. For 16.9% of respondents, they believed they would achieve this milestone by the age of 31-35.

On the other hand, 13.7% said they never plan to pay off their debts. A 2025 survey by Debt.com found that 34.77% expected to pass on debt to their loved ones after they had passed. [17] Debt.com, 'The Financial Toll of Grief: More Than 1 in 3 Americans Took on Debt After a Loved One’s Death', 2025 https://www.debt.com/research/funeral-debt/

If someone leaves debt behind after they pass away, generally this is paid for using money or property left in the estate. However, if this isn’t enough to cover the amount owed or there’s no one who shares responsibility for the debt, it could go unpaid. [18] Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, 'Does a person's debt go away when they die?', 2023 https://www.consumerfinance.gov/ask-cfpb/does-a-persons-debt-go-away-when-they-die-en-1463/

One in seven (13.7%) say they don’t plan to ever pay off their debts.

How many Americans are delaying important life milestones?

The survey asked participants whether they were currently delaying any life milestones due to financial or economic pressures.

Nearly a quarter of respondents are delaying owning their own home due to financial reasons

Despite being named the most important milestones, nearly a quarter (24.9%) reported postponing the purchase of their own home, while 23.2% said they were delaying marriage. Having children was also affected, with 16.2% of respondents putting parenthood on hold.

Other milestones were being delayed less frequently but still reflected the impact of financial constraints. Graduating from high school was delayed by 10.1%, and 6.6% said they were postponing college graduation. Advanced qualifications, such as completing a master’s, PhD, or other postgraduate degree, were delayed by 3.1% of respondents. Paying off debt, including student loans, was a challenge for 5%, and moving out of shared or parental housing was postponed by 2.4%.

Meanwhile, travel and life experiences were delayed by 3.8%, while buying a first car (2.3%) and retiring from work (1.4%) were the least commonly delayed milestones.

Delayed milestones
Milestone Percentage of respondents
Owning your own home 24.9%
Getting married 23.2%
Having a child/children 16.2%
Graduating from high school 10.1%
Graduating from college 6.6%
Paying off debt (for example, student loans) 5.0%
Travelling and life experiences 3.8%
Completing a master’s, PhD, or other advanced qualification 3.1%
Moving out of shared or parental housing 2.4%
Buying your first car 2.3%
Retiring from work 1.4%

Americans feel a mixture of disappointment (26.5%) and relief (24.8%) about missing important milestones in life

For people who had to delay a milestone, the most commonly reported emotion was disappointment (26.5%), followed by relief (24.8%). While this survey did not examine the reasons behind these responses, major milestones such as weddings, home purchases, or vehicle purchases are often associated with both financial pressure and long-term expectations.

Women were more likely to feel relieved after having to delay a milestone than men (27.4% versus 24.2%). Whereas men were more likely to feel indifferent to the change in plans (9.2% versus 7% of women).

Which milestones have Americans given up on?

The survey asked participants which milestones they now feel are out of reach of them to realistically achieve. Over a quarter (26.3%) said becoming debt-free was something they were giving up on. Alongside this, 26.2% said they didn’t believe they would realistically be able to own their own home and 17.9% said they have given up on the idea of starting a family or growing the family they already have.

Which milestones feel out of reach?
Milestone Percentage of respondents
Becoming debt-free 26.3%
Owning your own home 26.2%
Starting or growing a family 17.9%
Retiring comfortably at your desired age 13.7%
Advancing in your career 8.4%
Advancing in your education 3.3%
Travelling or living abroad 2.9%

*Respondents could select more than one option.

Cost of living blamed as the reason why Americans in the survey can no longer achieve traditional milestones

When it comes to the biggest financial barriers to reaching traditional milestones, 28.5% of participants pointed to the cost of living in America. Housing costs were cited by 27.3%, while 16.7% highlighted the expense of relocation.

The biggest financial barriers to achieving traditional milestones
Financial barrier Percentage of respondents
Cost of living generally 28.5%
Housing costs 27.3%
Cost of relocation 16.7%
Paying off student debt 11.1%
Not being able to afford certain qualifications or unpaid work experiences 5.4%
Lack of savings 3.3%
Earning a low wage 2.3%
Cost of childcare 2%
Healthcare expenses 1.9%
Job market instability 1.4%
Other 0.1%

*Respondents could select more than one option.

Alongside this, over one in ten (11.1%) said paying off student debt was one of the biggest financial barriers to achieving their goals. As of 2025, the average federal student loan debt per borrower in the U.S. is approximately $39,375, [19] Best Colleges, 'Average Student Loan Debt in 2025', 2025 https://www.bestcolleges.com/research/average-student-loan-debt/ highlighting the financial burden individuals may face in managing educational expenses.

Almost a third (28.5%) said the cost of living was the reason why they’re unable to achieve traditional milestones.

The pressure of traditional life milestones

Almost half of respondents (48.9%) said they feel a significant amount of pressure to reach certain milestones by a specific age, while only 2.7% said they don’t feel any pressure at all. When asked where this pressure originates, 26.4% attributed it to family expectations and 24.7% to societal or cultural norms. In contrast, just 0.7% said their pressure stems from celebrity influence, and 2% pointed to school or educational settings as the source.

Where does pressure to achieve milestones come from?
Pressure source Percentage of respondents
Family 26.4%
Society or cultural expectations 24.7%
Social media 19.3%
Friends or peers 13.3%
Personal expectations 10.2%
Partner or spouse 3.2%
School or educational settings 2.0%
Celebrity influence 0.7%
Other 0.1%

*Respondents could select more than one option.

Overall, women were slightly more likely than men to feel pressure from family (26.5% of women versus 25.3% of men), while pressure from society or cultural expectations affected men and women almost equally (24.2% and 24.8%). Interestingly, men were slightly more likely to report feeling pressure from themselves (10.6%) than women (9.9%), and they also felt more pressure from a spouse or partner (4.1% compared to 2.7% of women).

Where do pressures to achieve milestones come from?
Pressure Men Women
Society or cultural expectations 24.2% 24.8%
Family 25.3% 26.5%
Social media 17.9% 19.6%
Friends or peers 12.8% 13.4%
Personal expectations 10.6% 9.9%
Partner or spouse 4.1% 2.7%
School or educational settings 2.7% 1.8%
Celebrity influence 0.8% 0.7%
Other 0.3% 0.1%
I don't feel pressure to achieve things by a certain age 1.3% 0.5%

*Respondents could select more than one option.

The future of traditional milestones

When asked if financial or economic pressures had ever caused them to change their life goals, 45.8% of participants said their goals had shifted significantly, compared with just 2% who reported no impact. Women were more likely than men to report major changes, with 47.5% of women citing significant shifts compared to 41.7% of men.

Similarly, participants were asked whether financial pressures had altered the way they define success or fulfillment in life. Almost half (49.4%) said they had changed the way they define success slightly, while just 2.5% said they hadn’t changed at all.

Buying a home is the top milestone to aim for

When asked which traditional life milestone they would choose to aim for if their financial situation improved, 41.9% said it would be buying their own home. This is followed by 38.6% that said they dream of starting or growing their family and 5.5% that would travel.

Despite 19.6% saying getting married is a top milestone for them in terms of importance, just 3% said they would aim down the aisle first if their financial situation improved.

What milestones would Americans aim for if their financial circumstances changed?
Milestone Percentage of participants
Buying a home 41.9%
Starting or growing a family 38.6%
Travelling or taking a break 5.5%
Starting a business 4.7%
Getting married 3.0%
Buying your first car 2.0%
Retiring 1.8%
Returning to education 1.4%
Other 1.2%

Methodology

A survey was conducted on behalf of Self Financial surveying 2,023 U.S. adults about their attitudes towards achieving traditional life milestones. The questions delved into reasons behind skipping traditional milestones and their plans regarding these milestones in the future.

The survey was conducted between 7/21/2025 and 9/13/2025.

Demographics

Age:

Gender:

Sources

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